Tuesday, May 11, 2010 ; 8:34 PM?
SMILE(:
There, its over, faster than expected.
Well although its all over, I have to say, time with you was great.
Like the time on the bus, while eating, library.
It was good. I'll never forget this.
But I don't like this feeling, what wrong did I do?
What have i done?
Why do i feel that you're being so heartless towards me.
But what gone is gone, to tell the truth, you lost my trust, you took it all away the day you left.
Took everything away, you care and concern, your love, your freedom, your time, your heart.
You left me with so many, my love, my time, my freedom, my heart.
When i have problems, i drink, i feel bad, i smoke because you're not there anymore.
Everything have changed.
You're not the you anymore.
But i thought about things, if one say someone bully you, I swear, I'll be the first to stand up and last to fall.
I think i still love you. Alot. I just hope you're honest and remember me.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010 ; 2:07 AM?
SMILE(:
Hey baby.
Happy one month.
I wish we can continue counting until we lost count of the time we've been together okay?
I know you won't be reading this and you don't keep track of how long we've been together but I do, so don't worry babe.
I will keep track of our love.
You just be yourself alright, that's all i ask for :D
<3
With much love. I love you.
Oh yeah, actually I know this are just words. IF one day we separate, all this means nothing at all, I understand, let's just hope the day will not come alright.
With all my love I will love you. Bye.
21st of April. I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.
Although you may not be really the ONE I'm looking for, i still love you so very much. :D
We all have flaws but I will accept you for who you are because you love me. And of course, I LOVE YOU.
Thursday, April 15, 2010 ; 1:58 AM?
SMILE(:
Things are hard to change, I will still be me.
What can i give you, have you seriously thought about it?
Nothing. I can give you nothing.
I don't know how much you love me seriously because i know you love your ex ALOT ALOT ALOT.
And if i were be compared, how much am i?
I know you love me but sometimes it's just what you say.
Loveya, I miss you, WORDS.
I don't know why I am thinking this way but don't blame me, I'm just being myself. So yeah.
I really want to know how much you love me.
We talk a lot a lot on the phone.
Do you reallllly love me?
I'm pathetic. Shit man.
Baby I know I'm being unfair to you. But this are my doubts which I can never open my mouth to ask. So all I can do is to just write them down on somewhere you won't know, maybe when the time is right, I'll let you know and you'll be reading this.
But sometime I comfort myself. You've been with him for so long, It's normal if you love him more, I really don't mind, BUT you have to tell me, Because if you say that you love me more, it's a little hard to believe... :<
It's not that I don't believe you. I want to, I would love to! But I can't pass through myself. My own wall.
Don't think anyone will understand.
Baby, you have his photo in your phone, I know, I just don't wanna make you delete it if you really wants to keep it so much.
It hurts me every single time I read about your past posts and see picture of you and him.
I'm a human, please understand.
I really don't know, I have 0 confidence we will last too long, I'm sorry.
I really love you.
But i still think of my ex once in a while. Wondering how have she been.
If he was to come back to you, will you still love me?
Can you promise me if there is another guy better or another guy you really like, tell me about him.
Because i wish the best for you.
Don't love us two, just love him.
It's not fair to him if you love others.
But it is fair to me if you love him and not me because I will understand.
You understand what I'm trying to say?
I'll be sad, I'll be mad but they have this saying 'No matter how long the night, the dawn will break'
So don't worry about me.
To let go is a blessing from me to you.
Baby. You may not know how much i love you. I love you a lot. Really.
I can't give you anything but I'll give you everything i can give everything I can.
You're gonna have school already. All the best baby, I'll be here if you need anything.
I'm sorry I'm not a good student, I don't even know if there is any school that wants me now.
But if there is, I promise you I will study hard, you know I take promises very seriously.
Baby I love you.
Byes. 1st entry of me and you.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010 ; 7:48 PM?
SMILE(:
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Saturday, March 13, 2010 ; 6:22 PM?
SMILE(:
Another cool and real dream, taekwando.
You joined taekwando and have to spar, i requested to spar with you to make sure you wont get hurt.
I don't know why but i feel its a weird dream.
Again as per normal, we chit chatted for awhile and boom, another dream.
Its a nice feeling.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010 ; 10:16 AM?
SMILE(:
Sometimes i get emotional and just have the urge to sms you everything but i don't.
I hope time will make me a better person, more reliable, mature and responsible person.
After i find myself being able to prove to people that i'm better already then maybe i will try again.
Some words just can't be typed out, i know what i feel best.
There must be a reason why i always think about you on my way to work in the bus.
Its already so long and i shouldn't have any reason to like you, i keep telling myself this but it just dont make any sense, at least to me.
I want to know you better again. But there's always this wall that i cannot break through.
But i will break through, Give me a little time. I'm afraid how you will react, seriously, i've never been afraid of pretty much everything except for butterflies and being rejected by you.
I still can imagine your smile and everything related to you.
Tigger, hearts, coins, chocolate ice blended without pearl, strawberry yogurt, onionhead, 3 seats on the right from the back of the bus, yellow, waffle, kappa, pokka green tea( i dont know why, its my fav drink), bad hair day (when i have one, i think of you), teeshirt with pants, candles, strawberry shortcake, amos cookies.
And alot more. Rainy days makes me think of you too.
I still remember the bread you gave me. Your bro got it from HV, i looked for it, can't find. :(
If you happen to see this, im still here. I feel that you have not gone far. If i speed up, i might be able to catch up, although there's so much i don't know about you anymore.
No matter what. All i can do now is hope.
And ciaos.
Saturday, March 6, 2010 ; 4:10 PM?
SMILE(:
Since the last time i dream, 2 more dreams of you poped up in my wonderland again, one was last night.
Once i saw you in the dream, i know immediately that it wasn't real.
But cool we talked like alot. I mean as a friend... Maybe?
But it was really nice, you said abt your jc and i listened. It's a very nice feeling. Haha.
I think i want to dream more often now.
Sunday, February 28, 2010 ; 5:38 AM?
SMILE(:
Sometimes i really wish you to just forget me, so i can know you once more.
Be a better guy and do better in front of you.
Thursday, February 25, 2010 ; 3:11 PM?
SMILE(:
Even if i thought of a million ways to make you smile, i cannot think of a reason to ask you out.
:(
We know well that i'm not fit to.
Thinking of the way i treated you, i was over possessive and what, sensitive, protective.
I didnt know how to treat you right.
Only in my dreams can i really treat you right like a normal girl deserve to have.
Only in my dreams now i'm able to do this.
I hope you're fine these days.
Sunday, February 21, 2010 ; 5:00 AM?
SMILE(:
You know i can never let go of you, dont ask me why, i dont know. :(
Sometimes i just feel im just nt good enough for you.
Hope for the future, dont let go.
16(:
